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Those of you who have worked with me know all about anchors. An anchor is a neutral external stimulus that triggers an internal state. You remember Pavlov's dog and the bell, don't you? Yeah, that. Sometimes anchors trigger feelings we like that work for us, and sometimes, an anchor can bring up less desirable emotions. Almost anything can be an anchor. A tax form might trigger anxiety, and the sight of a tiny baby asleep in a fuzzy blanket might elicit feelings of tenderness.
Here's one for you. This is a recent photo of our dog.
Are you saying, "Awww, poor guy!" or having some other emotional response? If so, then chances are, you've had some experience with a sick or injured dog that had to wear an e-collar, and this image of our dog brings up the feelings connected with that earlier experience. (BTW, don't worry about Sammy. He's almost better now. The worst part, by far, for him was the collar.) The point is that an anchor is something you perceive that triggers an internal emotional state. Anchors can be visual, like the examples above, kinesthetic (such as the feeling of a nice warm bath or of a child holding your hand), olfactory/gustatory (your grandmother's perfume or macaroni and cheese from the school cafeteria), or auditory (maybe the sound of the little song on the ice-cream truck).
Now, sometimes anchors are triggered when we're least expecting it. Say, you're in an elevator, and you smell fresh lilacs. All of a sudden, you remember a long-ago summer barbecue and the boy you had a crush on when you were eight. Or you hear the sound of 3 sharp hand claps, and you're remember that feeling of getting in trouble in eighth grade.
Music can provide powerful anchors. Remember the scene in Jerry Maguire when Tom Cruise is searching the radio for the right song to match and sustain his triumphant mood and finally settles on "Free Falling" by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers? Advertisers know all about the power of music anchors. Ever notice how, when they want to sell a certain product, they'll use a song that is meaningful to their target audience? What about an audio/video combo that makes you laugh? Now that's a powerfully positive anchor! Check this out.
You can consciously and deliberately make those powerful music anchors work for you. Want to feel joyful, empowered, rich, focused, confident, or some other positive emotional state? Make a playlist of songs that trigger these feelings and play it for yourself anytime you want to change your emotional state to something that makes you feel good.
Here we are in our New Year. Do you feel different? I keep forgetting that it's not a weekend.
The first day of the new year provides a perfect opportunity to begin to create new things, but remember you can create change any day. I have a few trusty tools that I count on.
With a spiral notebook, a pen, and some index cards, you can create a whole new life. The iPod helps it along, too. My notebook has three sections. One is for goals, and the other two are for the two main issues I'm working on. (Maybe you're working on changing more than two things, but choose the top two to get most of your attention, and the other issues will be surprisingly cooperative.) Every day, I write down my long-term, short-term, large, and small goals. This keeps me focused and on track. In the other sections I record changes. For instance, if one of my areas for improvement is clutter, I keep a list of what I let go. It feels good to see the list grow.
On the index card, I write action steps, or a to-do list, that I carry with me during the day. I check off each item as it's completed. That feels good too.
The iPod is for listening to motivating podcasts, hypnosis downloads, and audio books. These keep me motivated and give me new ideas.
I forgot to include my dear friend, the digital timer, but I think you know how I feel about that for keeping me going and setting limits: I am nothing short of grateful, devoted, and awed by its powers to keep me moving in the right direction.
For New Year's Day, you need one more tool. This is for luck and prosperity:
It's black eyed peas. (I know it looks like a picture from a menu in a sketchy restaurant. Sorry.) We had this for dinner tonight. I first heard about this tradition in 1990. The next day, my story collection and my first novel sold to a publisher. Maybe it was a coincidence, but I've kept up the practice ever since.
It's New Year's Eve, kind of a magical time just before the new beginning. The party we're going to starts late, so how to spend those precious last moments of the Old Year, while honoring the Fresh Start about to unfold? I'm sure you already know the answer to that question. Naturally, I decluttered the fridge. Now it's all ready to receive new nourishing goodness.
Tomorrow I'll show you my magic tools for transformation--almost as good as a wand, but you can buy them closer to home than Diagon Alley. Meanwhile, thank you all for the goodness and grace you have brought to me this year. I look forward to making more magic and miracles with you next year.
This is going today. The presents are already put away, but the tree, the ornaments, the wreath on the front door, the animated moose in the front yard, the cute little Christmas decorations that are all around the house are all going back into their boxes and into the garage. I love Christmas, but I'm ready to move on. In fact, I can't wait. I'm almost as excited about clearing it all away as I was about getting it out in the first place. As you know, when you clear something away that you're finished with, you create space for something new and wonderful to take its place.
After I get all the Christmas stuff put away, I'm going to focus on goals for 2009. I'll write them down in my notebook, which starts to set some magic in motion. But I'm getting ahead of myself. First, I need to clear to make space to create. Anyone care to join me? Send me an email or post a comment about your clearing process.
Yesterday I took those 4 bags (see below) to Goodwill. The workers were busy with lots of cars lined up to let stuff go. "Do you take TVs?" a woman wanted to know. (They do.) I guess a lot of people decided to declutter after Christmas. After I'd handed over my bulging shopping bags, I moved on to return something at the mall. I was feeling lighter and lighter.
I can't quite explain what happened next. Maybe all those reports about DEEP DISCOUNTS got to me. Lately it seems that every newspaper, web site, and news program has been illustrated by big red signs in store windows that say "70% OFF!!" I keep hearing supposedly factual reports that "retailers are slashing prices," and that merchandise will never be this cheap again. That kind of story, repeated many times, can get a person revved up to buy. You don't think that's the point of all those reports, do you? Nah. Couldn't be.
Anyway, while I was at the mall, I bought an expensive Thing that I have always wanted. It's a high-quality Thing. There's nothing else like it on the market, although there are many imitations. Even though the Thing wasn't on sale, I bought it anyway. To my credit, I did hesitate for several minutes before I handed over my credit card. Well, wait, truthfully, most of the time leading up to the purchase, I was waiting for the manager to find out if there was another Thing in the back in a color I liked better. And while I waited for him, I was anxious that someone else might see my expensive Thing and scoop it up before I could pay for it, clutch it close, and lug it to my car.
I was halfway home before I realized I didn't need the Thing. At all. And it takes up a lot of space. I like it. I appreciate both its form and functions. I admire its durability and its versatility. But I'm taking it back. I got a little carried away. At least I snapped out of it before I used the Thing. It can happen to anyone, right? Please tell me it's happened to you.
Christmas morning, after all the presents were opened, my husband hurried upstairs to put his new things away. (He's the type who starts washing the dishes while people are still chewing.) I heard him rustling around up there for several minutes. What could he be doing hanging out by his closet all this time? Next time I saw him, he was carrying an armful worn shirts, pants that never fit right, and threadbare sweaters to the garage. "What a time to declutter!" I was thinking. "He lets it build up for years at a time, and then on Christmas, one of the very few mornings that he's home with us, he spends it clearing his closet!"
Then I thought, "Hey! Great idea!" I grabbed some empty shopping bags out of the recycling bin, took them and my presents upstairs, and got to work on my closet. Seven or eight minutes later, my presents were put away, and I had three bags ready to take to Goodwill. It was easy! I went here to list all our giveaways for tax deductions. (Scroll down to the heading, "Charitable Organization Estimation" and click on Goodwill for a printable list of commonly donated items and their value ranges.)
It doesn't take much, just a little focus shift and a few minutes at a time, and magic happens. I'm doing the same thing with my food, just eating what nourishes me, cutting way back on all the rest. Maybe you'd like to join me in this easy but powerful transformation. This is a great gift you can give yourself--more peace and time, as well as improved health, empowerment, and confidence. Isn't that what you really wanted in the first place? Check it out here, and contact me to sign up.
We have two cats and a dog. The cats are 10-year-old litter mates, adopted at the same time when they were seven weeks old. They live inside and often hang out together, as if they've discussed nap locations ahead of time, each curling up on opposite arms of the same couch, or calling to each other in some silent, secret cat language, "Let's go drink dog water!" and simultaneously convening in the kitchen.
Both are affectionate people lovers, but DB is the more outgoing, and Ricky is the shy one. Ricky is slight and slender, while DB is a little on the (ahem) "husky" side. Oddly, Ricky is also the dominant cat who determines whether they will share a space. For 10 years, they have always been perfect in every way. They even handled the addition of a dog two years ago with grace and aplomb. We love our cats. We have no complaints. Except . . . DB recently started using a corner of the dining room as his own personal litter box. I have caught him in the act multiple times. He has no shame. Here he is, acting as if he had done nothing wrong.
I have cleaned up after him repeatedly with Nature's Miracle. I added ANOTHER brand-new litter box in the downstairs bathroom, which I did not show to Ricky. I have tried coaching him to set a goal and see himself achieving it. I have telepathically sent him the image of himself pooping and peeing in his fabulous new box. He ignores this picture. He's got one he likes better, apparently, which involves going to one special corner of the dining room. I found him doing this again last night. And again this afternoon.
And here's what really stings. You know how in feng shui, a home is divided into spaces, each representing a certain "energy?" Well, DB is pooping on our prosperity! The nerve!
Is there anyone out there who can help me with this? Pet communicators? Cat trainers? Carpet cleaners? Please leave a comment or send me an email. Our whole family will be eternally grateful.
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